Home, Sweet Catbus
by True China Sorrows
Summary: The stress of leaving home for the wider world was bearing down upon Satsuki. She spoke of it to herself in the long nights. They weren't to know that she was feeling weak and insecure and fearful. She had to be the strong one.


Home, Sweet Catbus

With the imminent departure of Satsuki for university a sombre mood had drawn over the house. Tatsuo and Yasuko had felt the air of sombreness descend. They spoke worriedly of Mei in hushed whispers. She and Satsuki were close; _too_ close. She would be lost on her own.

As if to prove their worries true a low murmuring erupted from the attic. The hushed, muffled voices spoke in anxious and tense tones. Their words were fast; appearing and vanishing as soon as they were thought of. There were no pauses in the rushed conversation. It was followed shortly after by the slamming of a door.

Satsuki raced through the house without pause. She grabbed her jacket and fled the building. The cold, sharp blades of grass dug into her feet, but she ignored the pain. She ran and ran until her feet bled and the shrine loomed over her.

There, she crashed to her knees. She wheezed and panted heavily, clutching at her aching chest. Her thin arms shook violently. Her throat seared with ferocious flames. Her lungs were suddenly too small to take the breaths that she needed.

A low whine began in the back of her throat. She crawled forwards. The shrine was in front of her. It hadn't changed and neither had the great camphor. She wondered if Totoro had changed. In the depths of her heart she made her most fervent wish.

She wanted her life to be simple again. She wanted to run with Mei in the garden. She wanted to laugh with her parents over meals. She wanted to read books with her friends. She wanted to go to Granny and pick the fresh vegetables.

A great sob rocked her body. She curled up, clutching her most sincere of wishes and the past that had extinguished. It was then that the darkness drew in. It cascaded down from the night sky to offer as comforting an embrace as it could.

Through the darkness pierced a warm familiarity. The soothing softness clung to her. The gentle rumbling rocked against her consciousness. A cool breeze greeted her frozen face and stung with the sticky residue of dead tears.

Then, there came a soft rocking of her body. It broke the peace. The serenity of sleep was shattered. She whined and the disturbance vanished. However, in the distance, there came a loud sound. It stung her ears and echoed with yet another familiarity that she refused to pay heed to.

The shaking that came after was impossible to ignore. She whined loudly and jolted upright. The light burned her eyes and she yelped, jerking back. Her arms flew up to escape the blaze.

"Satsuki!" a startled voice exclaimed as two hands grasped at her. "Are you all right?"

She gaped. The light was faded. Her arms drifted back to her sides. There were curtains. The familiarity came racing back. It was Mei who had shouted. It was her mother by her side. The shadow by the window was her dad.

She tried to hide her surprise. "Mum, can I have five more minutes? I had a really good dream!"

She laughed. "Satsuki, you can't. Have you forgotten? It's time to go. The bus to Tokyo will be here in fifteen minutes,"

Her dad joined in. "Don't worry, Satsuki. I'm sure you'll continue the dream tonight. Why don't you go and get some breakfast? Your mum and I can finish packing for you,"

There were the unsaid sentiments of the previous night's argument and her storming. Satsuki nodded and hurried to the kitchen. Mei was sitting, hunched over the table, her face inches away from being in the bowl. Her brows were knitted tightly together, her lips were pursed and she was focusing intently on her meal.

"I'm sorry," Satsuki said.

She didn't remember what they had argued about. The memory was fuzzy and distant. It was as though it had happened many years before.

Mei replied sullenly. "It's all right,"

As the two sisters sat and ate the atmosphere eased. The silence ceased and tentative chatter rose. It continued to rise until a minute before the bus came and Satsuki had raced out of the house, shouting goodbye on her way.

It wasn't until she was seated on the bus, the house and her family gone, that the tears welled in her eyes. She was almost out of the area when she glimpsed the great camphor. She suddenly recalled the unforgettable plush interior and glowing eyes with a great grey passenger.

But, it was too late to say goodbye.

**Author's Note: Don't say anything. Please. I can't stand starting a sentence with words like that. I am kicking myself right now so you really don't have to. I just felt that there needed to be '**_but_**'. Anyway, this has taken months. I couldn't get it right and then I got mad. Then I just did other things. I'm quite happy with how this is. Also, I feel that, in case it demands otherwise, the title is** _Home, Sweet_ Catbus**. I guarantee that there is a difference.**** Thank you for reading. I do hope that you enjoyed this piece. I apologise if I have failed to satisfy or please you.**

**Part of the Revival Collection.**


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